Realising it’s about Rejection

Intro: I started typing this without direction, and came to a genuine realisation part way through. So then I set the title. So bear with me if it seems a bit disjointed at times – you’re following my thoughts. Thanks for reading.

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If you take a look at what I’ve done with this blog, it is a 100% authentic representation of how I approach things.

I start. I try. I really mean it. I pour my heart and soul in, and believe I can change and make a new start… then it’s 4 months later, I’m sat on my sofa in tears at nothing and wondering why.

Continue reading “Realising it’s about Rejection” →

Sleepless in Saxony

*please forgive typos, it’s late and I’m working from my phone…*

Yesterday I flew over to Germany; my work requires occasional international travel. The two nights I’ve been here, I’ve slept terribly. But, on the flight over here, for a moment there I was feeling quite positive. So, rather than lay in bed grumpy, tired but awake again, tonight at gone midnight, I’ve grabbed my phone to share a bit about what’s going through my mind.

I felt pretty shit all weekend; headaches, lethargy, general malaise. My sponsor challenged me to tackle eating while travelling as one of my first “red list” activities, so I wonder how much of the problem was subconsciously gearing up to a journey where I ate sensibly. Continue reading “Sleepless in Saxony” →

Running

Today, I realised that I’m running. I thought I was “on the right path”, and – one of my favourite (self-coined) phrases – “being the driver, not the passenger, in the journey of my life”. But I’m running, and that’s not necessarily the great thing I thought it was.

I’d been planning to move house. I don’t have a house yet, but I was planning to stay with a friend who lives hours away while I look. Up north, aka, in the cheap part of the country. Then, a spanner in the works cropped up. A big spanner. Continue reading “Running” →